Welcome to TurdBoomerang.com

Home of the unfinished creative projects of Chris "Turd Boomerang" Armstrong

Contents:

Games and Interactive Toys

I generally have a short attention span, and work on these kinds of projects only long enough so I can see them in motion, and then abandon them. If there are any proof-of-concept games here that you wish were longer/better/polished/not terrible, free free to contact me!

Note that most of these games are optimized for a modern desktop such as google chrome. They might "work" on mobile browsers, but they probably don't work well.

  • Skeleton Scramble Deluxe
    (My first commercial game release. Coming to Itch.io and Steam in Spring 2022. A fast-paced, head-to-head real-time strategy game about skeletons.)
  • Bounty of the Pumpkin Planet
    (A bite-sized strategy/resource management game, created for the 2022 Pursuing Pixels Game Jam, with a soundtrack by the incredibly talented Devin Nelson.)
  • My Lovely Wife vs. 100 Draculas
    (A charming twin-stick shooter about dismembering and beheading lots of Draculas.)
  • Nathan Finds the Moon
    (A five-minute block-pushing vignette game)
  • Smited
    (An arcade farming game, created for the 2023 Pursuing Pixels Game Jam, with the talented artist and designer Andrew Lee, of M.Duck fame.)
  • Lawn Buster for Hire
    (A puzzle game about mowing lawns with multiple endings. There is a hidden untested web version also available here.)
  • Groomsman Dating Simulator
    (A game about going on dates with my groomsmen to secure a date to my wedding. Based on real-life survey data from these idiots. Just kidding, ily.)
  • Podium Jostle
    (A 20-second game about sprinting to the end of a foot race.)
  • Neighborhood Jog
    (A short, relaxing neighborhood jogging experience.)
  • Jetbox Fan Game
    (A fan game based on the game "Jetbox", originally by Sapazu.)
  • Assault on Planet Jetbox
    (Another Jetbox fangame.)
  • Jetbox Pico-8 Demake
    (A port of the original jetbox to the pico-8 fantasy console.)
  • HTML5 State-Based Itch Template
    (A quick-and-dirty template for HTML5/javascript games that plays nicely with the itch.io iFrame on mobile, desktop and in-app.)
  • Turd Template: Pico-8
    (A template for top-down pico-8 games with placeholder menus, collisions, and a simple inventory.)
  • Lonely Winter Sunsets
    (An unfinished ascii roguelike about surviving in the wilderness during the dead of winter.)
  • Potato Game
    (An open-world puzzle game about a potato. Can be completed in under 10 minutes, but it's probably the most polished game on this list.)
  • Halloweenster
    (A short trick-or-treating experience with no real ending - yet.)
  • Dracula Ate My Neighbors
    (The demo for a halloween-themed monster battling game.)
  • B A C E B U L L
    (An arcade baseball game. Let me know how many runs you can score!)
  • Zork Clone
    (A text-based adventure. This is unfinished, but there is at least 20 minutes of content to explore. Features lots of goblins. There is at least one troll-related bug that was not fixed before I abandoned this one.)
  • FantXC19
    (A fantasy cross-country simulator.)
  • FantXC19 - Developer Build
    (The unfinished, season-long version of FantXC19, where you can develop your skills and accumulate fatigue between races, over the course of an entire season. There is no championship race at the end though, so don't get your hopes up!)
  • Battle Simulator
    (A tool for simulating very silly battles.)
  • TaggiePoo
    (An unfinished 2-player tag game.)
  • Spooky Ghost Hunt
    (Can you find the spooky ghost in your house? Probably. This is barely a game.)
  • Spooky Ghost Hunt 2
    (The long-awaited sequel to spooky ghost hunt, still in development as of August 2021. Play the unfinished version here!)
  • Redbeard's Handy Rhyming Dictionary
    (Not sure what to say about this one. I was going through a phase where I was making serious-looking websites with little-to-no purpose. I think this is very funny, but no one else seems to agree.)
  • F**k
    (Similar to the rhyming dictionary. This website lets you write curse words in different fonts.)
  • Bella Game
    (A short incomplete platform game about my lovely wife's parents' dog Bella. This runs a little slow, even in modern browers, because it was developed for Windows and then ported to HTML5 in Game Maker Studio. Use the arrow keys to move, and the down arrow to bark, which knocks the leaves off trees and scares other animals.)
  • TalkScript
    (A tool for creating choose-your-adventure stories, with 2 samples included.)
  • Love the Kitty
    (First first game with the SokPop Sok-Stories tool.)
  • Cremesicle's Farm
    (A sok-story about our cat on a farm.)
  • Flappy Beard
    (One of the first javascript games I ever wrote. Not much fun, and basically unplayable.)
  • Mazelike
    (A mostly unfinished procedurally generated roguelike based loosely on pac-man. Collect coins, use weapons, and avoid enemies. This is "complete" as long as you don't mind that there are only 2 types of enemies, a handful of weapons, and no win conditions.)
  • June 2019 Roguelike
    (A roguelike developed in June 2019. This was heavily inspired by the mobile game hoplite, and features exclusively emoji-based graphics. It's not finished, and it's also not very good.)
  • Idle Goblin War
    (An idle goblin-fighting experience.)
  • Yard Kitty
    (Simulation of a yard and the animals in it)
  • Reproductive Biology
    (Educational game developed with Kevin Connolly)
  • Dracula's Gonna Getcha!
    (Unfinished prototype)
  • ASCII Game
    (Unfinished prototype)
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Music

In 2017, I decided that I was capable of rapping, producing, mixing, and engineering music. The results can be found below. About 20% of the beats were stolen from other artists, in classic mixtape tradition. The original song or sample is usually noted in the song description, but it should be immediately clear, because these are the only songs that are even remotely listenable.

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Videos

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Social Media

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Downloads

Old Classics
(This is a google drive link to a zip file full of miscellaneous games I created as a child. They are all in .exe format, play exclusively on windows computers, and may crash when you get to the end. Below is a non-comprehensive list of what might be in there.)

  • Battle Maze: A 2-player game about battling in a maze, circa 2007
  • Munchies of Flame 2: A top-down shooter, circa 2008
  • After Dark: A top-down zombie survival game, circa 2009
  • Badminton: Badminton, circa 2009
  • Volleyball: Volleyball, circa 2009
  • Strategy Command: A top-down shooter disguised as a strategy game, circa 2009
  • High Noon: A high-noon cowboy dueling game, circa 2010
  • Man vs. Beast Reloaded: A 2-player asymmetrical competitive game, possible the first one worth playing, circa 2010
  • CTF: A 4-player split-screen capture-the-flag playformer. Looks like absolutely chaos, circa 2010
  • The Best Maze Game Ever: An unfair trial-and-error "puzzle" game, which probably crashes on the last level, circa 2010
  • James Challenge: A co-op puzzle game, inspired by Chips Challenge, and developed one summer with my neighbor. I stand by this one, circa 2012
  • Mini Rogue: A procedurally generated roguelite dungeon crawler. Another gem, though there isn't much content beyond the 6 or so unique enemy types, circa 2012
  • Ludicrous Monkey Fight: A 2-player game of some kind, circa 2012
  • Hallway: Barely a game, circa 2012
  • Murderfight: A 4-player, one-button, clockwise action game, actually really fun, circa 2012
  • Soviet Summer: A full adventure game, developed for a highschool project. 30 minutes of gameplay, circa 2013
  • Wargame Tactics: A 2-player tactical top-down shooter. A cool idea that was never fully realized, circa 2013
  • Dragon Garden vs. The Space Cult: A complete gardening/alien-fighting game developed for SamJam, circa 2015
  • Skeleton Scramble: The original Skeleton Game, a 2-player tower-defense hero RTS. Possible the best game I have ever created, circa 2015
  • Skeleton Game: The remake of the original Skeleton game in Game Maker Studio. This has up to 4 players, xbox controller support, and significantly more buildings and units. Though unfinished and unpolished, my friends and I played this for hours, circa 2016
  • Assault 2: A 4-player top-down competitive shooter. This is from approximately 2012, but was ported to a different version of Game Maker in 2019.
  • Munchies Reloaded: A remake of Munchies of Flame 2, circa 2013. Some friends have called this my best game ever, and I think it crashes on the last level.
  • Heist: An unfinished heist game. Date unknown. Honestly, you can skip this one.
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Contact

Send me an email at christopherernestarmstrong@gmail.com

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